


Moments of Hesitation

by Yitzock



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: FTM Sherlock Holmes, Gen, Trans, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, Trans Sherlock, Translock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-18
Updated: 2016-01-18
Packaged: 2018-05-14 16:26:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5750092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yitzock/pseuds/Yitzock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes Sherlock hesitates, but he has come to trust his voice even if he is not always sure of what to say.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Moments of Hesitation

Sherlock’s jaw worked as he tried to muster up his courage to speak.  The words he was struggling to say were words that begged – no, demanded – to be spoken, and yet now that the time had come to say them they were stuck in his throat.  There were so many things he had no trouble saying – why did he have to be nervous now?

 He had already put himself in a reasonably safe position – he lived on his own, almost finished university, and while they were helpful, should his parents cut him off he’d still be able to get by.

There was nothing they could do to stop him, anyway.  He’d jumped through all the necessary hoops and had just given himself his first injection earlier that day.  Fitting, that his new birthday fell on the same day as his initial one.

 "What is it, Willow?” his fathers’ voice asked from the other end of the phone line.

 “My name’s not Willow anymore,” he finally made himself say.  “It’s Sherlock.  I’m a man.”

He hung up the phone as soon as he finished speaking, unable to bear the anticipation of wondering how his father would respond.  It was his father’s choice to call back or not.

His father called back the next morning.  Everything was going to be fine, it seemed.  His parents did not want to stop knowing him.

==============================================================================

Sherlock stared through John, who sat across from him at the kitchen table at Baker Street, trying to process what his best friend – yes, he was his best friend – had just said to him.  Sherlock was going to be John’s Best Man at his wedding because Sherlock – yes, Sherlock – was his best friend.

“So, in fact…I’m your…best…friend?”

The words slowly came out of his mouth as he fully registered what they meant.  He was glad to have that affirmed, but he was too surprised to fully relish the feeling.

John had always been, since that first case, his truest friend.  He just never thought he’d be lucky enough for John to feel the same.  Yet now the obvious truth lay right in front of him.

==============================================================================

Sherlock’s mind briefly went blank.  What was he supposed to say next?

 _Oh!_ That was it – _telegrams!_

Speeches of this kind were never his strong suit.

But at least now, when he did speak, he could have confidence in the voice that formed the words.  He hardly ever thought about it anymore.  And it certainly didn’t cross his mind on his friend’s wedding day.

==============================================================================

Sherlock’s mind became devoid of language as his parents walked into his flat, the first time they had seen him in over a year, since that last phone call.

Sherlock knew that as soon as he spoke, his voice would be revealed as that not of the young woman his parents had once believed him to be.  He, who never fears others’ judgement, was afraid of the reactions parents will have before they put up their guard in the split second where true feelings cannot be hidden.  What if things really weren’t going to be fine?

“Hello, Sherlock,” his mum said.  He smiled at her weakly.

“Well, son?” his father implored.

“Hello…mum…dad…” Sherlock speaks quietly, hesitating.  He watched his parents’ faces, which were completely free from hostility.  He felt his eyes begin to well up and he then let out a small laugh. He had heard his deepened voice before that moment, but somehow it really sank in only then.  And he was happy.  His mother stepped forward and took him into her arms.

 “My boy….”

It was true. Everything would be fine.

**Author's Note:**

> I've never written a Translock story before, so I hope that if you find this that it doesn't have too many problems. I hope it can be of some kind of medicine to you, as all the Translock stories that I read have been for me.


End file.
